Looking up

Today, Aaron and I visited a "The Potter's Place." We didn't meet the people who live there, but they have built a little place in the wood for solitude and seeking the Lord. They live there, have a garden, a woodworking shop, a several prayer cabins for ANYONE to come at anytime and use. It's amazing really. So, it was a really nice and peaceful time, but it wasn't earth-shattering in any word I heard from the Lord, but I believe it prepared room for some perspective change that came later in the day through a conversation with Aaron. 

I read a little blurb from a book at the potter’s place today that said, “We cannot use someone else’s standards to judge our relationship with God. Asking ourselves honest questions will increase our self-awareness. In a limited lifetime, we cannot do everything. Choosing to do one thing means we cannot do something else. Fulfillment comes when our fundamental choices line up with our fundamental values.”

While I struggle often with what I am supposed to "do" and if it lines up with God's will and the gospel, I was struck today with the realization of why this gets to me so much now. It has always been something I think about, whether in high school, college, or post-college. But it's different now because I have all options available to me. I can live anywhere, have many different kinds of jobs, serve in so many ways, cook any food I want to, and go anywhere. Now, I am out on my own, trying to live the gospel and praying I am doing it the “right way.” But not only do I have all these options, but I am trying to live out the gospel in the context of marriage with another person who has different gifts and talents than I do, who looks at the world differently than I do, who interprets the same experiences differently than I do.

In my search to hear what the Lord what my to do, I look to other people. While seeking wisdom from other believers is encouraged in the Bible, often it is just that... to seek encouragement, not to do what they do, but to be encouraged to trust that God is going to work boldly in my life too. God has gifted me differently than anybody else on the earth. That is the most humbling, thrilling, and scary thought. There are things that He wants me to do that will come not from looking at other's lives, but at sitting at His feet. Not from listening to other's wisdom, but from listening to His wisdom. Not from reading book's written by other believers, but from His word.

The sermon on Sunday challenged me to think about sitting in his presence more. Being in His presence is all I will do after life here, so why do I not seek that all the time here? If we are to pray, "on earth as it is in heaven," then that means His presence here on earth. He has all the answers, wisdom, comfort, and guidance I need. He made me!