Lilley of the field

When my sister graduated high school and was preparing for college I wrote her a long letter of things I had learned my first few years of college and encouragement of truths to remember. Well, now she has reached another milestone of being engaged and so I thought I'd write another letter about that process. I would like to share a piece of what I wrote and pray it is an encouragement for many! Some people paint marriage to be all rainbows and butterflies and others like to keep reminding you how hard it’s going to be- which I'm sure both do out of good intentions. I like to try in genuine conversations with people to be real about the joys and the trials. Because it is hard, but you only work hard at something you love and care about. It is hard work unifying two people who simply have different goals, passions, desires, dreams, and personalities and then toss in the mix how we are all sinful, selfish people! But the best thing about marriage is foun...

I wanted to follow up my last blog post on anger with a post of praise. A praise of God and a praise of friends. On Wednesday, after writing the blog, I knew I should ask for prayer. These are times when you know you need someone and sometimes you take that bold step to ask and sometimes you hesitate and hold back. I always regret hesitating, I never regret asking. We are people who need prayer and there is something powerful about asking for prayer. It is humbling. It frees your burdens. You realize you are not alone. You realize the power of God through prayer. So there never seemed to be a good moment at house church to ask people because we just had a potluck and not our regular gathering of prayer and scripture reading. Finally people started leaving. I thought, "Oh well, next time I guess." Andrew and Mackenzie were deciding whether they wanted to leave or stay. And let me tell you, it was not a natural time to interject with, "Well, I was actually thinking may...

I have struggled this week deeply with being overtaken by my emotions- the main one being anger. That is a little scary for me because I am not usually angry. I would like to blame it on the end of the semester and the kids being crazy at school and busy christmas and tensions rising, but I simply can't. I must do two things. 1. I must take responsibility for my actions and feeling. 2. I must refute lies and accusations and giving into negative emotions with truth. James 1 says, " but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own  evil desire and enticed.   Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin;  and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. Don’t be deceived,  my dear brothers and sisters.   Every good and perfect gift is from above,  coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights,  who does not change  like shifting shadows.   He chose to give us birth  through the word of truth, ...

Mmm... this one was too good not to share. It's my first pureed soup. Amazing if I may say so myself. Aaron and Morgan agreed. Total cook time: 1 hour and 15 minutes. Ingredients: 1 butternut squash 1 tart apple 1 large sweet potato, peeled and cubed 1 small onion, chopped 2 large garlic cloves, chopped 3 carrots, peeled and sliced 2 T. butter 3 c. chicken broth (or veggie broth for a fully vegetable soup) 1 c. half and half olive oil salt and pepper dash of cayenne pepper 1/2 t. curry powder 1 t. dried sage dash of cinnamon Directions: Cut the butternut squash into 4 sections and lay on a cookie sheet. Cover with olive oil and salt and pepper and roast for 30-40 minutes at 400 degrees or until soft. Meanwhile, melt butter in large dutch oven. Add onion, garlic, sweet potato, and carrots. Saute for 10-15 minutes until a little brown. Add 3 cups chicken broth and apples and bring to boil. Remove the butternut squash, scoop it out of the skin, chop roughly a...

I haven't written about school in a while it seems. There's been nothing too noteworthy. It feels like we hit that slump just before Christmas where every one is blowing their nose so much we could fill a small pool, the kids are sporadic in attendance, and you wonder... is anyone even learning anything? Well today, I have two great moments. In one I wanted to kiss my kid on the head and shout, "You are learning!!" in the other, I wanted to pee my pants laughing and I was at a complete loss for words. Moment #theyareactuallylearning: I have a student who struggles, and I mean struggles, to retain anything related to number and letters. I just don't get it. A year and a half and it feels like we're getting nowhere. The strange thing is, he can recall characters from books SO well. Books that we read 6 months ago, he can still name the characters. So why can't he look at a 1 and say, "1?" I don't know. BUT I did decide a couple weeks ago to...

Peace. That is the candle for week 2 of advent... at least the meaning I like to assign. It can also be known as the preparation candle which can tie into peace very nicely. God opened my eyes yesterday to a new way of viewing peace. Peace is often talked about in the church and here's how it's often discussed. We are a people who desire order and calm and often find ourselves in the midst of a storm feeling like we have no peace. Christ has come and those who believe in Him have peace. It is not absence of the storm, but knowing God is present in the midst of the storm. We have peace. (all true by the way) But our faith is not just a way to have peace, our faith is the means with which we make peace. I started thinking about making peace instead of just having peace.. Peace is something that can be offered- to make peace with a brother or sister- to make a treaty of peace with an enemy. A peace offering says, "I am on your side. We fight together." Jesu...

This post may make me cry- I should get the tissues ready just in case. I arrived home at our little home, turned on the christmas tree lights which I love so dearly, unloaded the groceries, got into my jammies (yes it's 6:30pm), wished Morgan and Sam fun adventures on their date, and hunkered down with my computer for a quiet night in- alone. Aaron is in California for a business trip and he has left on his birthday. Although, I will say I don't mind that he left behind a very nice size of leftover birthday cake. However I can not make any promises about it lasting until his return on Thursday. So aside from that, I thought it would be a nice time to post here since it's been a while. I had this great idea of doing some advent "series" of posts... but I missed the first day of advent already. Good thing I have no formal expectations for this blog. "Series" are I suppose for the hardcore and committed bloggers. But I will still write about advent today...

Someone at work today called my husband a "hell of a man" today because he is working full time, doing grad school, and doing major work on our house. Tonight for dinner I couldn't decide what to eat because I was really tired from my crazy awesome day at school. I settled for a beer while I looked through our plethora of leftover containers thinking, "Aren't you supposed to have this many leftovers after thanksgiving?" Then, I saw the turkey leg leftover from school today and smiled. There was just something novel about have a turkey leg and a beer for dinner- which is exactly what I did. And Aaron said, "I'm a hell of a man 'cause I'm married to a hell of a woman." That's right mister ;) Anyhoo, I have been reflecting on my day at school and this year of teaching in particular. God has done amazing things and continues to do so. I am so grateful for my wonderful kids. We had a Thanksgiving feast today with my children an...

It really wasn't a bad day. It wasn't until about 5:45 that it went downhill fast. After trying to be the good wife and go to the store to get squash for squash casserole to make for Aaron's thanksgiving feast at work.... I realized- I DON'T HAVE THE STUPID SQUASH as I am driving out of the Bilo parking lot. I managed to buy many things at the grocery store... none of them what I actually needed. So I berate myself, get home, unload and decide to go to Ingles because I can't face the people at Bilo again. Aaron's not home yet so I call him to see if he will pick up squash on his way home instead and I say, "Have you left work yet?" Of course his response is an excited, "Look out the carport window." There he is pulling up to our house. So I explain what happened. He thankfully and graciously volunteers to go to the store for  me. All the while I am yelling obscene phrases about the STUPID SQUASH at him like I'm mad at him. Can you tel...

Here's a few of my earth friendly, nature inspired and free (or next to nothing) fall decor: Pretty maple leaves from the school across the street from us! Branches from outside my favorite. I had dried ferns in these and decided to change them for the season to maple leaves! Thanks to Jordan Tate for those awesome candle holders. A pinterest inspired creation! Fall pumpkins. Thanks Aaron for cutting the wood for me :)

I feel ready to burst with all the thoughts that I would like to tumble out on the page. Where to begin? I've just had a beautiful glimpse into the way God made me and so many people around me. It started off being unsure of myself- as so many of my adventures begin. Really it started off with music. I have a deep love for music. I always have. Sometimes when I go on trips, I buy a CD right before it and listen to it on the journey because when I hear those songs in the future, I will be able to close my eyes and recall details of the trip that no other stimulant can trigger. Music is so powerful. Music has the ability to conjure up many different emotions. Two things that can cross any cultural or language barrier. Music speaks to the soul. When my heart is full of joy, it makes me want to sing. So many times the Psalmist says that he wants to sing God's praises. Singing seems to be such a natural response in humans to the joys and sorrows of life- seeming to get us throug...

Today was a particularly crazy day at school for many reasons. It is a full moon. It is the day before Halloween. It is 2 days before a field trip. It is 3 days before our fall break. We have not had a break in 2 months. Everyone is at their wits end it seems. I found myself becoming easily angered today. During my planning period I read Psalm 84 and it truly echoed what I was feeling in my soul. The Psalmist describes longing to be with God and continually trusting in Him. The verse that really stuck out to me was 5-6: "Blessed are those whose strength is in you, whose heart is set on the pilgrimage . As they pass through the Valley of Baca, they make it a place of springs." The idea of setting my heart on the pilgrimage just clung to me and got me through the day. I praise God for taking away my horrible headache in the middle of the day. I got home and I stood outside in the cold and the whipping wind watching the dogs play in the yard. I started praying outside a...

My heart started so heavy this evening after reading an email and thinking on some things I know going on in friend's lives. It just grieved my heart to know there is such pain and suffering in the world. I found myself missing some deep, rich time journaling and reading scripture because I've been working out in the morning or running when I usually spend some quiet time with God. I've still be using that time to listen to songs and worship, but I found myself needing a different quiet time to really come to God and lay my burdens down. Among other things, I had been thinking about the girls coming tomorrow morning to the Potter's Place to do art with myself and 2 other "mentors." I am so excited and so nervous. I don't know what to expect at all. That's probably a good thing. Being a special education teacher means I've become really good at doing things well on the fly. The girls coming are part of a program in which they do community service ...

It was Grandparents Day at school which doesn't usually mean much except that it's somewhat more crazy with the influx of new people in the school and the kids are more hyper than normal- if you can call anything in my class normal :). One of my assistants took the students whose grandparents were coming to the library and I realized I missed meeting one child's grandpa which made me disappointed because one of my goals for the year is to have stronger relationships with the parents and to really support them. At the end of lunch, our occupational therapist brought the child and his grandpa back to the cafeteria so I got to meet him! We talked about all the neat things his child- who has autism and is non-verbal was doing in our class. His grandpa was amazed. So we invited him back to our classroom so I could show him some of those things. I showed him how his child could answer questions using an app on our iPad that speaks what you type into it. I showed him how his c...

Day one of the run. The alarm went off at 5:15. I should back up. Last night when I let the dogs out before I went to bed, I realized how dark it was in the morning and wasn't sure if I wanted to run by myself. So Aaron said he would run in my vicinity, but not next to me. Back to the alarm clock. We arise, put on our running clothes, stretch, and head out the door. I was expecting it to be cold, but it had rained overnight and was quite mild. We only ran a short distance, but it was so wonderful. Then the best thing happened. God had held the rain for us because about 10 minutes into our run it started to sprinkle which was so refreshing and freeing. When we made it back to our house it started pouring and continued to pour for about an hour. I love that. On other great praises of God. He just loves my children. Today I was working with some of my profound students in the side room. I was working with a child to hit a "Big Mac" button which would then play the radi...